If you want to get your marriage off on the right foot then read on to find out some of the bone head moves to avoid.

Losing the Ring

This is probably every groom’s nightmare. If you’re an unorganized guy then put it in a safe deposit box and forget about it until the wedding. At the wedding it’s the responsibility of the best man to keep the rings so make sure you pick someone who is going to be responsible.

Most wedding parties include a cute little ring bearer that holds the rings on a nice looking pillow. While this is a neat tradition and he may be a cute little kid you would be better off waiting until the last minute to give him the rings. At no other time would you ever give a toddler thousands of dollars worth of jewelry so why start on the most important day of your life

Show up Late

Showing up late to your own wedding is not a good way to get on your future wife’s good side. The best way to avoid this is to stay close to home. That means having the bachelor party well in advance. You also want to account for possible delays in traffic or people being late so make sure to tell your bridal party to be there well before they need to just in case.

Don’t Pick Your Idiot Friend as Your Best Man

If you’re like most guys you probably have a friend who is the life of the party but completely unreliable and about as mature as a three year old. Those kinds of buddies are great but can be hard to count on. And chances are your fiancé can’t stand him anyway. By no means should you destroy a friendship but if you can choose a more responsible person and make your crazy buddy a groomsman then go that route. If you think that decision would ruin the friendship then go for it. But maybe rely on your other groomsmen to help out more.

Don’t Let Her Do All the Planning

Guys get off pretty easy when it comes to wedding planning anyway so acting like you don’t care is pretty insensitive. Take the initiative and do some research on what the groom’s responsibilities are and then get going.

Don’t Air All of Your Past Discretions Right Before The Wedding

If you haven’t let all of the skeletons out of the closet then keep them in there until at least the honeymoon is over. Your bride to be is probably stressed out enough and she doesn’t need to hear about your string of one night stands in college or the fact you have kids that live in another state. Timing is everything. You should know about each other already and if you’re hiding things shame on you, but you’ve kept things in this long so waiting longer until the hoopla of the wedding is over is probably best.

Don’t Get Drunk the Night Before

We’ve all seen the funny movies where the groom is out of it on his wedding day because he and his buddies got sloshed the night before. It’s okay to have a good time but give yourself plenty of time to adequately recover.

People are getting married later in life and may be on marriage number two or three. That means they have their own philosophy on money and are used to being in complete control of their money. Relationship experts almost unanimously agree that if a couple can’t join their finances there could be underlying issues.

Marriage is a partnership and finances are a major part of marriage. But what works for some couples may not work for all. Let’s look at the pros and cons of having a joint checking account.

Pros:

• Keeps it Simple

With one joint account there’s less banking that has to be done. It also means less paperwork. It can be hard enough to maintain one account let alone two. One account means one statement.

• Signifies Trust

Money is a sensitive topic for a lot of people. Money is really a value system that shows a lot about a person. Having one account shows your spouse you’re committed and have absolutely nothing to hide.

• Team

God forbid you or your spouse gets in an accident, but what if that happens and you have no information about their checking account. This could cause some major financial damage. When there is one account it fosters more of a team environment. It may also encourage responsible spending  habits because you know your partner is going to see every penny you spend.

Cons:

• Bad Financial Habits

Having a joint checking account can cause major drama if one person has a habit of frivolous spending and bouncing checks. Their financial indiscretions can actually wind up hurting their spouse’s credit.

People bring along their bad habits when they get married. You might snore loud at night or leave the tooth paste tube unrolled but what if one of your spouse’s bad habits is not paying their taxes or credit card bills on time? Unfortunately the IRS or creditors don’t care whose money it is in your joint account. They’ll take what they want including “your” money.

• Privacy

Privacy is marriage is not always a bad thing. What if you like picking up your spouse a gift and surprising them? That’s pretty hard to do when there’s one bank account.

• Saver vs. Spender

What if you like to save up and accumulate a cushion and your spouse likes to spend every last cent in the account? Again, this can cause major drama in the relationship. One partner may end up resenting the other because their hard work of saving ends up going for naught as the other partner comes in and spends it.

• Unequally Yoked Salaries

What if one person makes a large salary while the other is clocking minimum wage? Some people feel that what’s mine is mine and what’s yours is yours. This philosophy is completely fair and makes things simple. It works for a lot of older couples who married at an older age.

While most financial and relationship experts agree that having a joint account is better each marriage is unique. What works for one couple may not work for the other. Some people have a joint account but keep their credit cards separate. This arrangement is called hybrid finances. Whether you decide to keep things separate, joint or a little of both the key is to communicate early and often.

It’s time to take control.  Recognize that cold feet can happen but there is something you can do about it before jumping to any conclusions and causing your loved ones a lot of heartache.  Below are some helpful tips on how to avoid the dreadful bridal nerves and cold feet.

1.     Get away from the planning

Wedding planning in itself can be very stressful.  Meeting with photographers, planning the budget, and tasting cake samples can take its toll on the bride and groom.  Some brides-to-be exhibit characteristics of anxiety during the planning stage which may freak out the groom-to-be if he is accustomed to a peaceful and good-natured girl.  The emotions run high and the groom may do one of two things: fight or flight!

By getting away from the planning and taking a break, you will be able to reflect more on what’s important and less on the tedious tasks that will be there when you return.  Plan a night out with friends with the ground rule that the wedding will not be discussed.  Another way of escape is to take an afternoon for just you and get pampered.  Spas and manicures are a great way to relax and unwind.  The groom may want to go shoot a round of pool with the guys or watch a game with some friends and relax.  A couple’s date where the wedding planning is off limits is another way to bring the couple back to center!

2.     Rekindle the flame

During the wedding planning stage, a lot of couples experience a seemingly drifting apart in their relationship.  The woes of planning and budgeting can get to them and it can be crucially important to take time to rekindle the romance.  Many successfully married couples have reflected on the cold feet they experienced before the wedding and noted how important it was for the couple to remain tight.  Romance is key!

Planning a dinner together that is just you two is a must during this stage of life.  The dinner or date should take place periodically throughout the planning stage to prevent your love from getting off focus.

3.     Seek advice from a trusted friend

Getting pre-wedding jitters advice from someone who has been through it and conquered is important.  A trusted friend, person of influence, rabbi or pastor can steer you in the right direction.  The key component is not to get advice from just anybody.  You certainly don’t want to seek your bitter co-worker’s advice that has been divorced three times and questioning their sexuality.  The advice you get may be a little jaded and off course.

4.     Write down your fears

Take some time to keep a wedding journal detailing your emotions, feelings and desires.  Write down the fears you are experiencing and read and re-read them over the course of a few weeks.  Determine what the root of the fear is and provide a solution for each fear noted.  For example, maybe you are experiencing a fear over the loss of your identity.  The solution could be to instill a girl’s or boy’s night out each month or week.

Whatever the fear, aside from serious character issues, a solution may be in your control.  If it is your fear, you have the power to change it.

Below is a list of helpful tips and ideas of how you can save on your wedding without it looking cheap.  Major areas of savings covered include:

• Wedding venue
• Decorations
• Invitations
• Wedding dress
• Reception

The place the wedding is held can be an expensive element to the big day.  Finding an inexpensive place to host the celebration is one of the most significant areas the couple can save.  Once a conservative and realistic budget has been determined, finding the place to host the wedding is the next step.

Some couples find that a place that can accommodate both the wedding and reception is often less expensive.  Free receptions sites like a park or friend’s back yard are great for saving money and with some careful planning can look like a million dollar setting.  Outdoor gardens that belong to friends or relatives are great places to host the reception.

The cost of decorations for the wedding can add up quickly. Less is more when decorating for a church wedding.  A lot of times the church offers decorations for free when the fee for hosting is paid for.  Greenery is an inexpensive route for décor and brides-to-be have grown their own flowers prior to the wedding to save a beaucoup on the bouquet.

Homemade wedding invitations are becoming more and more popular with the wide variety of computer programs available on the market.  For an extremely cost effective invite, try making your own by using Microsoft Word.  Invitations can be tastefully constructed to fit into a business sized envelope.  The savings on postage will be great when you avoid the odd sized shapes of standard wedding invitations.

The wedding dress can often be one of the most expensive items on the list.  Some brides plan to spend a lot on their wedding dress while others take a more practical approach and avoid the inflated cost for a one day affair.

General clothing shops offer greater deals on wedding dresses than those stores who only carry wedding dresses.  For a more sentimental approach to the dress, some brides have chosen to wear their mother’s dress and added their own touch to it.  A seamstress can alter the dress and add a few items that will jazz it up.  The savings is great when a dress is borrowed from a friend or family member.

Saving money on the reception can be great and should be looked into when planning a budget friendly wedding.  Not only can you save with the reception site but also the refreshments.

As discussed previously, finding a wedding site that offers a place for both the ceremony and reception can save the couple big bucks.  Having the reception in a friend’s backyard also has the potential of a huge savings.

The reception food and drink is another significant expense.  Caterers can be costly.  Some couples have found that preparing their own food has saved them a lot of money.  A friend in culinary school or a family member who owns a restaurant can be big helps during this time.

The wedding cake can be quite expensive and a large task to take on unless you are skilled.  Cupcakes are a nice touch and can be made in place of the traditional wedding cake.  Cupcakes can be made and decorate by the wedding party which will add a sentimental touch to a classy yet inexpensive wedding.

1. Select the Wedding Attire for the Groomsmen

This means you’ll have to know what the colors are going to be so talk it over with your fiancé. Once you know you can go to the tux shop and pick something out. It may be a good idea to narrow it down to three options and then run it by your bride-to-be before placing the order.

2. Arrange Accommodations for Out of Town Guests

Once you’ve figured out roughly how many people from out of town may be coming you’ll want to book a block of rooms at a nearby hotel. Arranging hotel rooms can turn into a nightmare if it’s put off. Don’t drop the ball now or you’ll end up paying later.

3. Arrange Transportation to the Wedding

This may seem like a no-brainer but if you have people coming from out of town that don’t have access to a vehicle it can become a logistical nightmare. You’ll want to plan transportation for the bride, her father, the bridal party, the groomsman, the best man and yourself.

4. Arrange Transportation to the Reception

It’s okay to get separate cabs on the way to the wedding but now you’re a married couple so try and get a nice limousine just for you and your new wife to go over to the reception. And don’t forget about the wedding party, they will need transportation as well.

5. Purchase Gifts for the Groomsmen

You’ll want to give your groomsmen something as a token of your appreciation as well as a way for them to remember your big day. Most of the time you get the same thing for everyone and a little something extra for the best man. Getting the same gifts for the groomsmen avoids hurt feelings. Popular choices range from personalized cuff links, knives, flasks, and wallets.

6. Plan Rehearsal Dinner

Planning the rehearsal dinner can be quite a daunting task. If you feel uncomfortable doing by yourself get your best man to help you out. You’ll need to secure a location, select a menu, and find out the number of attendees. You’ll also want to find out if anyone has any special dietary needs.

7. Prepare a Toast for the Rehearsal Dinner

The toast doesn’t have to be anything grand, but you’ll want to be gracious towards your guests and thank them for being a part of your wedding. This is the time when it doesn’t hurt to butter up your future in-laws by telling them how great of a job they did raising their daughter, etc…

8. Obtain Marriage License

This mundane task can be forgotten amidst all of the other planning. Most states require you to go the county auditor’s office and apply. It’s a pretty easy thing to do and not as cool as planning a bachelor party which is why it can be forgotten pretty easily.

9. Get a Gift for Your New Bride

You’ll look like the best new husband out there if you pick up your wife something special that you can give to her. The best time to do this is on your ride home after the reception. If you can’t afford something fancy just make sure it’s from the heart whatever it is.

10. Ask Mom!

If all else fails, follow the sage old advice: Ask your mother! She knows all about the ins and outs of wedding and this future MIL will be able to set you on the right path!

1. Get on the same page

This is a great idea for any wedding; gay or straight. Now that you’re engaged you should set aside some time and discuss you and your partner’s thoughts on what the special day should be like. Better yet, make it a romantic night out and discuss the wedding over dinner and a glass of wine.

2. Set a Budget

The average wedding in the United States costs $30,000. That’s a yearly salary for some people. Money, or lack thereof, will dictate your decisions. This can also help in setting the date in case you and your partner need time to save up. You’ll have to sit down and evaluate your financial status and see if you want parents or other relatives to chip in and help.

3. Build the Guest List

First make a list of everyone you want to invite regardless of their location and your budget. Then once you’ve got everyone written down from both sides begin to reduce the guest list based upon who you think will actually come and what you can afford. This will help you and your partner to get an approximate number so you can move forward and book a venue for the ceremony and reception.

4. Secure Location for Ceremony and Reception

It’s best to announce the date of your wedding after you’ve secured your location. Be prepared to have to wait too. Many popular wedding locations are booked out nine to twelve months in advance.

5. Secure Wedding Official and Wedding Party

If you have someone in mind that you want to do your wedding then you’ll want to acquire their services as soon as possible. If you’re going to have bridal parties you’ll want to check on their availability. Many wedding dates have had to move because members of the bridal party were not available.

6. Don’t Skimp on Photography

There are many ways to save money on your wedding but cheaping out on photography can come back to haunt you. Your wedding photos are going to be with you forever and capture the day like nothing else. If the photos come back looking terrible you’re stuck. Look for other ways to save money like less expensive flowers or cheaper food at the reception.

7. Gay-Friendly Vendors

Search the internet for gay-friendly vendors who have products and services tailor made for gay weddings. It’s also a great idea to find gay wedding forums where you can get recommendations from other couples who have been down the road before.

8. Infuse Your Personality

This ceremony is in celebration of you and your partner and should reflect that. Ultimately you’re doing it for yourselves and not others so do what you want even if it’s a little outside the box.

9. Revisit Budget

Take a look at your budget again and see where you are. If you have extra money you can spend it on wedding stuff or save it for the honeymoon.

10. Take a Week Off

If you’ve planned in advance you should take some time off and relax with friends, family and your soon to be spouse. Planning up until the last minute is stressful for everyone involved especially for you and your partner.

Here are some helpful ways to turn the tables and ask him to marry you:

• Rid the old fashioned thinking

This isn’t the 1950s Leave it to Beaver era, today’s modern woman knows what they want and how to get it.  When you have found your Mr. Right and are certain he feels the same way about you, why wait?  Take the plunge by asking him to marry you.

Today’s man seems to prefer a woman who knows how to take charge and what better way to express it then by taking charge of the nuptials.  Conventional thinking disbars a woman from taking charge and igniting her inner confidence but rather believes that only the man has the ability to make the decision.  Women today are gravitating toward the new era where women can choose when and what they want.

• Make a list

In preparation of popping the question, making a list of the reasons why you want to marry him should be made.  Check your heart and make sure there are good reasons to marry the man of your dreams.  If there are reasons that include revenge, manipulation or control, then this may not be the time for a proposal but more of a time for counseling.

• Anticipate the reaction

If your significant other would freak out at the idea of non-tradition and would not accept the proposal from you, then you probably shouldn’t do it.  Some men feel it is there duty to propose and if the tables are turned may get hurt or feel dishonored.  Known his personality and know it well before taking the plunge.

If you are aware that he has been experiencing doubts about marriage, you would also be wise to hold off.  If he is the man of your dreams, he will be worth the wait.

• Choose the location

The perfect location is very important when popping the question.  Traditionally the man finds the most romantic spot or memorable place on the planet, but the woman can change it up a bit.  The place should be a location that he loves or one with significance attached.

Sporting venues offer excitement and anticipation already, so what better place than to pop the question.  Some venues will even allow the proposal to be announced overhead or written on the scoreboard.  Concerts are another popular place to propose to your man.  Take him out for a nice dinner and present him with the tickets to his favorite band.  A little VIP action can get the band involved with a congratulatory speech once he’s accepted the proposal.

• Let it flow from the heart

You can’t go wrong when you ask from the heart.  Staring attentively into his eyes and letting the words flow from your heart will be the most meaningful expression of your love.  Don’t forget to go all out in destroying convention by getting down on one knee and letting him know how serious you are.

Be expressive in letting him know how much he means to you and how you cannot go through life without him by your side.  As you speak, grab his hand and allow your passion for him to consume you.  The confidence and zeal you express will gladly be received.

There are many things to consider when choosing the right photographer.  Below are some helpful tips to consider when choosing the person or team that will be capturing your special day:

• Level of experience
• Budget range
• Photography style
• Personality chemistry
• Understanding the contract

Choosing an experienced photographer is important to the quality of your photos.  Inexperience may result in the photographer missing candid shots and messing up on images that can never be captured again.  There is no room for inexperience when it comes to the photographer of your special day.

It is important to interview several photographers before choosing the right one.  During the interview process ask the photographer if they have done wedding before and if so, how many?  Photographers who make a living out of photography may be the wiser choice than selecting a friend of a friend who dabbles in photography as a hobby.

When it comes to photographers, less is definitely not more!  Shopping by price can be a problem so allow yourself some room in the budget to choose the best photographer you can find.  You don’t want to choose the cheapest photographer on the market and you certainly want to stay within your budget.

It is important to understand fully what the price you pay will entail.  Ask the photographer what the packages offer.  Does the package include reprints, albums, proofs, etc?

Another important tip in choosing a wedding photographer is to understand what type of photography you want.  Candid shots are customary and capture every aspect of the day that you wouldn’t normally get if only formal pictures were taken.  Discuss your needs with the photographer to ensure they are qualified to deliver what you are asking.

If you are looking for a mixture of black and white pictures and color photos, make sure your photographer knows ahead of time.  Formal and classic poses should always be included.

Personality can be an important aspect when choosing a photographer.  There should be certain degree of chemistry when you interact with the photographer.  You don’t want an old fuddy duddy who won’t take on any creativity.  Photographers should be outgoing, upbeat and confident that they can capture all of the precious moments of your special day.

Another aspect of personality is if you see yourself getting along with the photographer.  Personalities should match and your photographer should be open to receive any advice or expression of guidance you offer.  After all, it is your special day.

The contract is a huge aspect of hiring a photographer and before signing on the dotted line, you will want to make sure you understand every detail.  Make sure that everything is written down, even the special requests that were agreed upon.  Every detail of the event should be spelled out on the contract so that nothing is left undone.  If there is any doubt in mind, do not sign the contract.

The required deposits and payments may also be specified on the contract.  Cancellation specifications should be clear and there should always be an opt out clause.

One last tip before choosing your photographer for the big day is to get a list of references and actually follow up on them.  Speaking to other brides who hired the photographer can provide the most insightful information about the photographer.

The average wedding in the United States costs nearly $30,000 and more and more couples have to foot the bill themselves.   Budgets and extensive planning are just some of the reasons that the rate of elopements is one the rise. Below are some of the most helpful tips to elope with class and dignity.

• Invite your friends and families

This does not mean you will invite everyone on the original guest list, but does include some of your closest friends and family members.  Parent will be thrilled to be included and the invite may avoid offense.  It is also important to invite close grandparents, siblings and each of the partner’s best friends.

Avoid inviting large groups and keep it small.  The group could go out to a nice dinner after the intimate ceremony and the cost will be kept down tremendously in comparison with the cost of a large reception.

• Hire a photographer

Since you will be saving on just about everything else wedding related, hiring a photographer to be with you at the court house or city hall is a classy touch.  When wedding announcements are sent out, your family and friends will appreciate their professional photograph.

Also, splurging a little for a photographer will provide memories that will last a lifetime.  Couples who elope and do not have pictures taken at the ceremony regret not capturing the special day throughout the years.

• Have a reception party

Elopement can be just the two of you but for a little class and style throw in a reception party after the ceremony.  Friends and family will love being a part of the day even if it was the exchanging of vows.  Themed parties or classy and catered cocktail soirees can be had following the elopement.

Some couples who have eloped opted for a sit-down dinner with close family and friends then on to dancing and cocktails later in the evening. Others have chosen to allow a family member to host a barbecue or dinner part y in the couple’s honor.

• Plan ahead

Even though you are eloping, planning and organization is required to pull off a classy event.  Marriage licenses require time and most applications will not be processed in one or two days.  Due to the time required, eloping to Las Vegas has become quite popular.

• Make mention of your anniversary in the announcement

Not inviting your friends, family members and acquaintances can leave feelings hurt, but by mentioning their presence at your one year wedding anniversary just might calm the emotions.  Some couples have found that by including a note requesting the guest attend their wedding anniversary party adds a special touch of class to the elopement.

Some couples include a best man and maid of honor to the eloping ceremony, while others include only their parents.  Grandparents, siblings, and friends can get upset and feel left out.  Make a big deal out of the anniversary and everyone will love you.

• Dress the part

Even if you are eloping and have decided not to wear the traditional gown and tuxedo, dressing up for the occasion adds a nice touch.  The photos will look a lot better if you dress the part.  Avoid wearing jeans and a t-shirt on this memorable occasion.  Splurge for a nice cocktail dress or pants suit and dress coat.

Construction your own wedding invitations at home can be cost effective and save time when special ordering.  Some of the most unique designs and creative ideas can be captured on your own personal wedding invitation made at home.

The benefits of making your own wedding invitations include:

• Cost savings
• Convenience
• Pick your own paper or card stock
• Design it yourself

One of the most important benefits of making your own wedding invitations is that they will save you money.  If over on budget or even under, saving a little more money that can be applied to the honeymoon won’t hurt.

Home-made wedding invitations can be constructed to fit into a business sized envelope which will not cost more than a regular stamp to mail.  No extra stamps will be necessary and you will save a lot of bucks when mailing to 250 guests or more.

Convenience is another key factor when deciding to make your own wedding invitations.  Wedding invites can be done in the comfort of your own home and from your very own computer.  You won’t have to wait six weeks or longer to receive your order but can have them printed within minutes of designing the first invitation.

Once the date, time, place for the special day have been set, the invitations can be printed.  Some choose to wait until just prior to mailing in case anything changes but the convenience of printing from home allows for some flexibility.

Convenience also comes in the ability to pick out your own design and paper.  When ordering pre-made invitations, you lose the personal creativity factor.  While some companies allow a small degree of personalization, most offer a select amount of wordings, script and paper.

Before beginning to design your invite, a photo should be located that you want to incorporate in the invitation.  Some choose to eliminate the photo, while others like the personalization it brings when guests open up their invite and see a beautiful picture of the happy couple.

Items Needed to Make the Invitation

• Cardstock, either white or cream are customary
• Microsoft Word or equivalent computer program
• Hole punch
• Scissors
• Paper cutter (sharpened)
• Pieces of clear vellum
• Ribbon spools (optional)

Step by step do it yourself programs are available, but for an extremely low budget wedding, invitations can be constructed using Microsoft Word.  Just set the dimensions on the program and start designing.

Some couples have incorporated stamps and embossment into their invitations.  That is what is so freeing about making your own invitations; the sky’s the limit when it comes to creativity.  There are no restrictions and it is entirely up to you on how the designs turn out.

Depending on your personality and the month of your wedding, various colors and palettes can be used.  Some choose to coordinate the colors of their wedding with the font colors or paper color of the invitation, while some eliminate color and stick to the formal black and white look.

If you are artistic or have an artistic friend, you may choose to have a picture sketched of the happy couple to grace the front of the invitation.  Landscape, hearts, or other pictures may also be incorporated with the design of the invitation.  There are no barriers when constructing your own wedding invites.